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Hi, I am Ben Bernanke and I create ‘money’ OUT OF NOTHING!

April 11, 2012

‘Satire’ can help to reveal reality if used creatively!

Most Americans are totally unaware of what is now happening with our Monetary Policy and with our Federal Reserve System. Americans listen to our Fed Chairman, Ben Bernanke, and assume that he has tremendous power and authority. But do they understand the details of his operations in realtime? How are ‘money units’ (which we call ‘dollars’) created today? How do ‘money units’ (dollars) enter the greater economy? What is our ‘dollar’ today…in reality? Why is our economy manipulated by just a few unelected individuals with no realtime oversight by our elected representatives? Why is official ‘counterfeiting’ (of our ‘dollar’) allowed today? Let’s look at our situation from the viewpoint of Ben Shalom Bernanke, our Federal Reserve Chairman…and let’s use some ‘satire’ and creative sarcasm. 

 A reasonable definition of satire, then, is “a literary manner which blends a critical attitude with humor and wit to the end that human institutions or humanity may be improved. The true satirist is conscious of the frailty of institutions of man’s devising and attempts through laughter not so much to tear them down as to inspire a remodeling” (Thrall, et al 436).

Hi, I am Ben Bernanke and I get to create the American ‘dollar’ via my thinking (my consciousness). I do not like gold or silver (as money) because these commodites limit my ability to create ‘money units’…out of thin air. I also, do not think that gold is real money, philosophically. Recently, I have created trillions of ‘dollar units’ via my Desk Computer…located at the New York Federal Reserve Bank. I am the person who initiated what the media calls…QE1 and QE2 and Operation Twist. I have the Authority to create trillions of ‘money units’ to protect select financial institutions who might fail…if I think they are important and crucial to the current banking System and/or our global economic System.

I and my committee, called the Federal Open Market Committee, can and do initiate all monetary policies for the American economy and also influence the events in the global economy with my(our) thinking and decisions. I now can officially ‘counterfeit’ as many ‘money units’ (called dollars) as I think the economy might need. All this is possible today because our money units are ‘ imaginary’ symbols and numbers. Our ‘dollar’ today is ‘no thing’ (nothing) and I create new dollar units by thinking up numbers in my head…and then having these units entered (digitally) into my Desk Computer, located at the NY Fed building.

My decision to ‘counterfeit’ some $1.5 trillion of money units for my QE1 policy and some $600 billion of money units via my QE2 policy was done via a very simple and direct process. After thinking up these numbers in my head, I then got my FOMC committee (5 members agreeing with me is a majority) to vote that these numbers (called ‘dollars’) were needed to reliquify the American economy and to get the banking system back on its feet. With a telephone call or an electronic communication I can initiate these types of actions if I think a monetary emergency is imminent or a potential event.

I then initiate a Directive that goes to the Manager of the System Open Market Account at the NY Federal Reserve Bank in New York. This manager then increases our SOMA (System Open Market Account) via computer digitization…and my checking account is increased ‘magically’ by merely punching numbers into the SOMA computer account. I do not need to ‘print’ any paper notes or purchase any gold bars or coins to accomplish this mathematical result. Money (today’s digital dollars) magically appear in my SOMA account merely by punching new numbers into my computer account. What a great System!

Since the American ‘dollar’ today is ‘no thing’ (nothing)…merely an imaginary ‘number’ derived from my head (consciousness), I can create and manipulate Monetary Policy exclusively via my thinking. Dollars (what the market calls legal tender money) magically appears in my Desk Computer Screen based on my prior Directive which I sent to the Desk Manager (my loyal employee…called the Desk Manager…sees that my Directive is implemented precisely as I determined it should be). Many pundits call this process creating ‘money’ OUT OF THIN AIR. Others call this process creating ‘money’ OUT OF NOTHING. I call it “creative monetary policy” and I avoid the word QE  or quantitative easing…and instruct my colleagues to use the words ‘asset purchases’. Words are key to my presentations and my thinking when I talk to the public.

Since all of the above is done privately and secretly for the most part, few can discern what I am thinking and doing in realtime. The members of Congress do not ask me what I am ‘thinking’ prior to my implementation of a Policy in realtime. The members of Congress do not know what I and my FOMC committee are ‘doing’ operationally in realtime. The Congress and the American people ‘discover’ what I have done AFTER I have done it. The Federal Reserve Act, passed in 1913, and updated as needed…allows me and my FOMC committee to create all these new ‘counterfeit’ money units and call them LEGAL TENDER. It’s all legal and official! Congress is ultimately responsible for my behavior and my policy actions (per the Federal Reserve Act of 1913).

I am the most powerful monetary Authority on this planet today because of this process and the secret operation which I and my Committee run. Few know what I am thinking and few know what I am doing to the American and Global economy…in REALTIME. We call this situation…INDEPENDENCE from political influence. I AM…Ben Shalom Bernanke, Chairman of the Federal Reserve System, and I am generally recognized as the most influential person on this planet when it comes to MONEY and DOLLAR policy. I and my counterparts around this planet (collectively called Central Bankers) really are operationally the SOURCES for all monetary events on this planet. Money rules the world and ‘we’ collectively RULE over ‘money’!

Since the vast majority of American people have ‘no’ idea what I think and do, I can continue with these policies and realtime operations until either the American Congress or the American People discover that my role is corrupt and/or not Constitutional. Money rules the planet we call Earth, and me and my Central Banker counterparts (globally) essentially RULE this planet and determine the direction of future events. Please don’t reveal any of this information to knowledgable Americans or monetary pundits. The System I run ONLY WORKS if people (the American people especially) are kept in the ‘dark’ and my operation is implemented privately and secretly. This System has now existed and operated sucessfully since its founding on 12/23/1913. Don’t ruin my day!

Conclusion:  2013 is the one hundredth year birthday since the Federal Reserve Act was passed by a deluded American Congress. Will it survive much longer as the word gets out to the American People? Will the American people understand the issue of ‘money’ and the corrupt nature of this operation (called the Federal Reserve System)? Can our economy continue to function and grow (going forward) with this type of monetary manipulation and official counterfeiting of our ‘monetary units’? That is the 64,000 question? Enjoy this ‘satire’ on our Monetary System and its key leaders. Hopefully, this irony and satire will ring some bells or create some serious thought…going forward!

Wisdom:  Thomas Jefferson wanted to eliminate the national debt because he saw it as a cesspool of patronage and corruption. He warned his Treasury Secretary that debt would commit the nation “to the English career of debt, corruption and rottenness, closing with revolution.

  • “I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies…”
  • “The issuing power should be taken from the banks and restored to the people, to whom it properly belongs.”
2 Comments leave one →
  1. Frank G. Hooper permalink
    April 25, 2012 10:47 am

    This is the most revealing writing I have ever read regarding the US dollar and how the Federal Reserve operates. I hope and pray that it is not too late to change!


    • April 25, 2012 5:15 pm

      It also speaks to me as I read these words of my inner view of Mr. Bernanke’s Fed.


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